Guest post by Lettie Kirkpatrick Whisman

“What do you think you do well as a caregiver?

The question was asked by a discussion leader in a caregiver support group for the spouses of stroke survivors. I knew my answer immediately. Although there were moments when my exhaustion and the demands of my life made me question whether I did anything well, one thought would emerge to correct my doubts.

“I give my husband the gift of anticipation.”

I had learned how important it was to offer Phil something to look forward to as he endured his post-stroke disability and fight for improvement. When he was able to begin eating (after two years), we offered favorite foods that he could swallow, like chocolate shakes and pancakes. As he became more mobile, we took brief outings to parks and to church. He was eventually able to tolerate short trips, even a visit to the Ark Encounter in Kentucky.

When Phil first left the intensive care unit for a rehab facility following his stroke, I could tell his first therapist did not hold out hope for Phil’s physical recovery. He began moving Phil’s lifeless legs and said, “Just remember, this world is not our home.”

At the time, I felt like he was trying to prepare Phil for the possibility he would never improve, and I worried that the remark, though well intended, would kill Phil’s hope. But through the years, I thought often of the truth and hope in that statement. Because of Jesus, we will see total healing for Phil. We’ll dance and hike together again someday!

God also knows how important it is for us to have the gift of anticipation. The knowledge that something better is ahead can give hope, encourage our hearts, work patience, and carry us through dark places. And that’s what we all need.

Now if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with patience.
—Romans 8:25

Lettie Kirkpatrick Whisman’s “credentials” to write from the perspective of a caregiver are solid. She gave ongoing care to her special needs daughter for nineteen years, her elderly grandmother for thirteen years, and to her beloved late husband for five years. Find her books and bio at www.writingforhim.com 

Tracy Crump dispenses hope in her award-winning book, Health, Healing, and Wholeness: Devotions of Hope in the Midst of Illness (CrossLink Publishing, 2021). A former intensive care nurse, she cared for her parents and her mother-in-law and understands both the burdens and joys of caregiving. Her devotions have been featured in Guideposts books, The Upper Room, and many other publications, and she has contributed 22 stories to Chicken Soup for the Soul® books. She also conducts writing workshops, freelance edits, and proofreads for Farmers’ Almanac. But her most important job is Grandma to five completely unspoiled grandchildren.